One of my favorite quotes from the movie “White Men Can’t Jump” is when Sydney says to Billy, “Look man, you can listen to Jimi (Hendrix) but you can’t hear him. There’s a difference man. Just because you’re listening to him doesn’t mean you’re hearing him.” And the argument goes on . . . Little did I know when I first heard that line how true it was and how much it would apply to my present day life and career.
I remember sitting with a client at her kitchen table discussing the project ahead of us and I was trying to “hear” what she was saying but I know now that I was just “listening” to her. A pipe had burst in her cabin and it ruined the kitchen floor and cabinets. As we talked I found out the cabin was for sale and it had been on the market for the last couple of seasons. This was in April and the house-selling season was just around the corner (almost as exciting as the holiday season!).
She told me how much she liked the character of the cabin and how sad it was that they were selling it. I proceeded to try and get the job done as quickly as possible to get the cabin back on the market. I found replacement cabinets that were very similar to the existing cabinets, and asked the client to come to the cabin and take a look. Much to my surprise, she thought the cabinets did not match close enough. We ended up using different cabinets, but that wasn’t the root of what was happening.
Although getting the cabinets replaced quickly meant the project would be done and the cabin could get back on the market, that meant she had to let go sooner. This cabin was a symbol of her family. So many memories and experiences took place there, so selling it was very emotional for her, and understandably so. I finally “heard” what she was saying.
When I was listening to her in our initial meeting I heard “let’s get this done quickly” when what was really said was, “I want to show my appreciation to this place and give it the best I can before we part.”
We all have emotional ties to the physical places we have lived or experienced. If I would have “heard” what the client was telling me from the beginning, my job could have been a lot easier. So, next time you are talking with someone, try to really “hear” what they are saying, it makes a world of difference.
Thanks for reading,
Dan